Another Second Time Around
by Mystical Machine Gun
Summary: Our poor virgin Itachi; it is not easy to have a gay little brother and a job at a convenience store. Then he meets a weird guy and along comes a lady in pink, who teaches him the secrets of womanhood? SakuIta, SasuNaru, M - SEX. NOT ITASASU!
1. Chapter 1

**ANNOUNCEMENT:**** THIS STORY DOES NOT MEAN THAT I HAVE STOPPED WRITING SASUNARU/NARUSASU - THIS WAS A COMMISSION.**

For Linda 3

Well, now I offer you something totally different! This is a het story, OMG! Anyways, the side pairing is still our dear SasuNaru, so do not judge this just because the main pairing is something else. **Now we will see how many of you actually appreciate my writing and not just SasuNaru/NaruSasu in my stories**. If you like my style, prove it ;D

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

**Pairing**: Sakura x Itachi, Sasuke x Naruto

**Summary**: Our poor virgin Itachi; it is not easy to have a gay little brother and a job at a convenience store. Then he meets a weird guy and along comes a lady in pink, who teaches him the secrets of womanhood? SakuIta, SasuNaru, M - SEX.

**Disclaimer**: I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

_Another Second Time Around_

I sit behind the counter my face plastered with a stiff and fake smile. Welcome to Stan's convenience store, how may I help you…I keep repeating, though I would like to choke these cheap-arse people, who believe they are God-like since they earn more than me and thus treat me like garbage. All because I work here. Hell, it was not my choice, but I have to earn my money somehow. Fucking Stan…

Well, if it is not that weird dude with the insane eye patch again. He always looks so lost in here even though he comes so often. Not that he buys that much anyway. It is rude to follow people too closely so I merely watch him from the corners of my eyes. Pathetic. How fucking long can it take to choose the toilet paper??? Of course he has to almost destroy the shelf before he makes it to my counter. You could say he is a regular and at my counter too…

Haha, I ran out of toilet paper, he laughs sheepishly. Yeah right, you are just hiding the condoms with the package, but I cannot say that out loud. Instead I open my mouth and say to him that dear Sir - that is not toilet paper but a pack of diapers. He looks at me as if I just told him the meaning of life. No kidding, he smiles then and looks at the pack. Do you need them or would you just like to buy the condoms, I ask him pretty loudly.

Shhh, he whispers and looks embarrassed. I cannot control my tongue anymore as I offer him some porn DVDs after the condom comment and secretly I wish I would get fired so I could leave this shithole. Stan, you suck. The man merely laughs awkwardly and leaves without buying anything. I am sure he will not come back.

I was wrong about two things - I did not get fired, because no one cared and he came back to buy that toilet paper, but without the condoms. You are an interesting guy, he smiles at me after buying his royal butt-wipes. Thank you for choosing Stan the man, I smile so radiantly that he has to cover the only visible eye he has. Stan the fucking man. The next day he is back again. I am Kakashi Hatake, I work as a host, he tells me.

Stan the man says thank you, I say to him after he has paid his things. So, are you like Stan or just his biggest fan, he says, his face full of things I cannot read. Would I work here if I owned this place, I ask him and leave it at that. Thank God, there is the nagging old hag behind him who smells like camomile. Now I prefer her although the smell makes me want to puke. Anything but the eye patch man. Thank you Stan.

That Kakashi person is here again, but now only loitering around. Buy something, I growl at him quietly. You cannot get rid of me that easily, he whispers back and begins to pick out small dried plums one by one. He is doing this really slowly and it makes my head tick like a fucking clock. I want to stick those dried son of a bastard plums down his throat, dip him in camomile and then set on fire. Yet, there he is still picking those annoying things - he has been doing that for the past hour now.

I close the counter and go to him. Dear Sir, Stan would not like you to hang out here, I smile again with that stupid smile I have created for situations like this. It was the same thing last summer when the old fart from next door decided he wanted to pick every fucking little bean with chopsticks he had stolen from this Chinese restaurant. I am the deliveryman of Stan's hate although the guy probably does not even remember he owns this place. Anyway, I would like to think that I am his right hand man who punishes people for wanting to pick anything one by one. God created everything in pairs.

Want to go get something to eat, Kakashi asks when the time of closing Stan's little paradise is nearing. I do not eat, I tell him but then he asks about drinking. Do you have a drinking problem, he continues with curiosity in his voice. No, just with the company I am drinking with, and again that radiant smile of mine. I will wait till you get this Eden closed up, he laughs and a few nasty words leave my lips.

So, now we sit in a bar and I so want to poke his only visible eye with a needle. Are you in love with me or are you just curious about my eye, he asks like it would have been the most normal thing to lust after his eye? What the fuck? I do not swing that way, I say and take a sip from my soda. Whoever said anything about a swing, we are not in a playground, he laughs so hard he almost chokes. Oh, why will he not just die…I need a smoke, come with me, he says nonchalantly. Like an obedient dog I follow.

I never caught your name, he says inhaling the smoke. Itachi Uchiha, I reply dryly. Age, he continues. Twenty-two, I answer and feel like I am being interrogated by the police. Great, I am only two years older than you, let us be friends, he smiles and reaches his hand towards me. I look at it like he had leprosy. Do not be so uptight, this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship, he says through the smoke barrier. I am tired. I reach my hand and shake his; this is really fucked up. I merely grunt and then leave; the best way to avoid everything that comes after that kind of shit. Stan says that a customer is always right - I am just doing what I can in a situation like this. His hand was sweaty.

I walk back home, since the last bus has already flashed its middle finger at me and left without goodbyes. It is two o'clock in the morning before I am safely home in the warmness of my house. What took you so long, Sasuke asks. He is awake and shirtless, drinking milk straight from the bottle. That is gross, I grunt at him while I take off my shoes. Naruto is spending the night, he says lazily as if it was nothing out of the ordinary. Well, it is not, since those two are dating. I am going back to sleep, he yawns and walks upstairs.

It took me some time to get used to the idea that my sweet baby brother was one of those people who find comfort in the same sex. He was never really interested in girls, but he could have picked someone more suitable. Naruto is nice, I have nothing against him - but damn he is loud when they do THAT. I do not know any other gay people so of course I -back in the day- wanted to clear out some possible misinterpretations I might have had.

Like, would it not be better to pierce the heavens with a drill instead of getting that drill deep in your arse? For the first time I felt naïve and childish when he laughed at me. That does not matter; what matters is with whom you are and how you feel. Such deep and meaningful words from a fifteen-year-old. The more I thought about it, the more convinced I was that it was not their relationship that bothered me but the absence of such a relationship in my own life.

I am not into guys, but I do think it would not matter if I was really in love - except I have not been, in love and no less in a bed with someone, naked? No. Sad to admit, but my only friend is my left hand and it can comfort me only that much. God, was I ashamed that my little brother was so much more experienced than me in so many ways. They have been together for two years now, Christ and I have not even had my first taste in anything except random groping in the train me being the victim of big hairy hands. Still makes me shiver.

Morning, oh God, I hate mornings. I walk downstairs in my pyjamas and what do I find? Sasuke and Naruto sitting like newlyweds practically feeding each other cereal. I hate it how Sasuke's laughter sounds like bells, when Naruto tells him something stupid and I hate it how Naruto smiles warmly at Sasuke being grumpy. I totally hate happiness, why would anyone deserve it? I want someone to feed me cereal too and get me milk for my coffee that tastes like tar thanks to Naruto's awesome coffee making skills. Sasuke never complains even though the spoon stands on its own in the coffee, which is against all laws of physics.

So, Itachi, did you score last night, Naruto grins like a little kid who has found his father's porn hide. I was drinking with someone, I reply dryly. Oh my God, Sasuke, your brother has totally found someone!!! He almost screams. Sasuke looks at me suspiciously and then returns his gaze back to Naruto. Virgin eyes, he sighs. What, no way, Naruto awes. Do not talk about my sex-life at the breakfast table, I grunt. Or the lack of it, Sasuke retorts lazily.

Was it a girl, was it, Naruto asks enthusiastically. A guy, I reply and take another sip from the ugly mug. Oh my God, are you batting for the same team as us, Naruto practically yells and Sasuke chokes on his orange juice. No and I do not even know how to play baseball, I reply. Sasuke hits his head purposely against the kitchen counter and cries that I am one stupid fuckface. I mean, you like guys too? Naruto continues while patching Sasuke's bleeding forehead. Hell no, I say raising my voice a little too much. Is he prejudiced, Naruto asks Sasuke now, who seemingly wants to cry some more.

I leave the table to change my clothes, because I actually have to go to work. By the way, my friends are coming over tonight and we are heading out, Sasuke tells me when I tie my show laces. You mean those three freaks, I growl at him. Well, sorry for having a social life you do not have and anyways, Naruto has to go to see her aunt, so this works pretty fine, he smiles slightly. Be sure to keep that Suigetsu kid far away from the fish tank, I do not want my neon tetras to die, because he has the urge to feed them a three course meal with side dishes and a dessert…I murmur. Sasuke laughs, but promises to do so. Stan, protect my fish, please?

**ANNOUNCEMENT:**** THIS STORY DOES NOT MEAN THAT I HAVE STOPPED WRITING SASUNARU/NARUSASU - THIS WAS A COMMISSION.**

Thoughts? Comments?


	2. Chapter 2

**ANNOUNCEMENT:**** THIS STORY DOES NOT MEAN THAT I HAVE STOPPED WRITING SASUNARU/NARUSASU - THIS WAS A COMMISSION.**

For Linda 3

Well, now I offer you something totally different! This is a het story, OMG! Anyways, the side pairing is still our dear SasuNaru, so do not judge this just because the main pairing is something else. **Now we will see how many of you actually appreciate my writing and not just SasuNaru/NaruSasu in my stories.** If you like my style, prove it ;D

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

**Pairing**: Sakura x Itachi, Sasuke x Naruto

**Summary**: Our poor virgin Itachi; it is not easy to have a gay little brother and a job at a convenience store. Then he meets a weird guy and along comes a lady in pink, who teaches him the secrets of womanhood? SakuIta, SasuNaru, M - SEX. NOT ITASASU!

**Disclaimer**: I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

Naruto puts his shoes on too and lets Sasuke kiss him right on the lips. The kiss makes a funny whistle-like sound. Remember, Valentine's Day is coming, Naruto whispers to Sasuke, but I can still hear it. Shit, it is February already. Naruto walks me to Stan's and asks me about my date - I am trying my best to convince that it was not a date, but he never listens. My counter awaits me looking lonely and deserted. Hey honey, I am home.

Another boring day until Kakashi shows up again. I want a dust bag for my vacuum cleaner, he smiles brightly. No you do not, I say and pretty much ignore the whole comment. Could you help me, he asks really loudly and of course I have to, since it is the policy here at Stan's. "If someone asks for help, you must do everything you possibly can" is Stan's principle in life. Kakashi knows the dust bags are on the highest shelf and I look ridiculous reaching for them. After hanging for, like, thirty minutes between the shelves, metal poles and a helper chair, I finally get them.

Anything else Sir, I ask him. No, he smiles back at me. Oh, yeah, I am coming by your house tomorrow so wait for me after work, he tells me and pays. Stan, I cannot smile, it hurts to even try it. After my work hours I take the bus home. I put on my pyjamas, pick a random horror movie and make a nest on the sofa. I sit in the middle of blankets and chew on the corner of the pillow while watching scenes I already know by heart.

Sometime in the middle of the night Sasuke comes home reeking of alcohol. You are a minor, I snort at him. Sasuke just laughs weirdly and slumps on the sofa next to me. Did you have fun, I ask him. Somewhat, he replies and steals one of my blankets. He is in half-sitting position, his head between the sofa and my back. I do not want to sleep alone, I miss Naruto, he groans. You are just drunk - you see him pretty much everyday and you two fight all the time…how the hell can you miss him, when he is not even gone, I ask him flabbergasted.

It is different if he is at home, since there is always the possibility that we can see each other, but now he is at the hospital and cannot even answer the phone, he sobs. This is the reason why under aged children should not drink…they become the biggest cry-babies, who need constant assurance that everything will be alright. I…think I am totally in love with him, Sasuke whispers and fucking dozes off. Just for the fun of it, I draw moustache on his face and leave him sleeping on the sofa. The next morning he swears at me and delights me with his middle finger and a couple of up-yours.

Today I actually have to mop the floors at Stan's. I hate it with the power of thousand suns and usually manage to avoid it. Today, Stan, I was caught and now the mop laughs its nasty laughter in my hand. While mopping the ugly linoleum floor I spot Kakashi smoking outside the store. He is leaning casually against the glass wall. Finally when I am finished I step outside and he flashes a magnificent smile.

I have never been to your place, you know, he whistles. It should stay that way, I remark, but he just keeps grinning. Stan, he has a motorcycle. Your eyes are twinkling, Kakashi laughs. You bet they are; pure sex on two wheels. In the end I ride his bike sitting in the back clinging to him in an all too girly way. We reach for my house and step inside. Take your shoes off, I order him. Oh, nice house, he says and we walk into the living room. Then I hear Naruto's all too familiar voice as he notices us from the kitchen.

Oh my God, are you Itachi's boyfriend, he practically giggles. Kakashi cocks his head to the side and looks amused. No, I am actually his best friend and trying get him laid, girls and stuff, he laughs now. Well, that is amazing too, our Itachi is so antisocial, Naruto awes. And you are? Kakashi asks Naruto. Before Naruto can answer the question, Sasuke has already encircled him with his arms. Sasuke murmurs that Naruto is his boyfriend and at the same time introduces himself properly. I am amazed he can do that after the moustache episode.

Do not let us bother you, Naruto smiles and Sasuke drags him upstairs. So, your brother has his taste in men, eh, Kakashi asks me. Well, yeah and no, it is more like they are just annoyingly gay for each other…I reply dryly. Kakashi laughs heartily. Is a horror film okay, I ask him while looking for something decent to watch. Sure, he says. I pick the movie and we arrange ourselves on the sofa. In middle of the movie the sounds from the upstairs are starting to get louder; harder, faster, deeper a voice yells. All I can think of is the Olympics and I am trying to pretend I watch horror sports.

The noises of sweaty sex penetrate with force the living room and Kakashi raises his gaze to the ceiling. Quite lively, huh, he mumbles and I decide that now is the time to hit a bar. So, we end up at Brizzles - it was totally Kakashi's idea. We sit at the counter and the image of the counter at Stan's lulls me to tranquillity. Some busty woman asks Kakashi for fire, and instead of offering her his lighter, he gives her his host card and promises to set the poor woman on fire in other places. Whether he meant it literally, I do not know.

Suddenly this absolutely gorgeous woman walks to Kakashi and pokes him in the back. Hey there, mister eye patch man, long time no see, she flirts to him. Kakashi's face brightens as he seemingly recognizes this woman. Oh Sakura, my cherry blossom, he grins and the woman pokes a little harder. Then Kakashi looks at me and I can tell he is summing up numbers in his head. Hey, Sakura, this is my friend Itachi, Kakashi introduces me and I stiffen. How should I greet her? Sakura looks at me with her hazy eyes and smiles sweetly.

Hi, I am Sakura Haruno, a former classmate of the playboy who sits next to you, and it takes me some time to understand whom she is referring to. Hello, I say. I totally ruined it. No one says hello anymore! Oh God. Somehow she still stays with us even though I cannot function properly. She is so pretty…why cannot I be normal!!! The night is quite fun although I do not have that much to say, but just watching her makes me happy. It is almost three in the morning until we leave the place.

The seed is planted, Kakashi grins and decides he wants to eat something. We end up at Densha Burger and of course he has to order the most expensive thing; the kyuubi burger and I have to pay for it. I will pay next time, he smiles apolitically but I know the piece of shit host is lying. But then again, maybe I should live a little and take a burger too. Why do you have two of those, I ask amazed looking at two burgers on his tray. I paid for two and there are three, I continue. I do not know, maybe it is a ghost burger, he laughs. After eating I head home thinking that it was not so bad.

It is Saturday and I cannot understand this one thing; why would Sakura call me? In the evening my phone rang and it was her. She wanted to meet me and we ended up agreeing on seeing each other tomorrow. Kakashi comes over after my text message regarding the matter and looks like a proud father. My boy, you are going to score! Eases the up-tightness, he smiles. No, you do not understand you stupid thing, I scream. Thing? He looks at me amazed and bursts out laughing.

He is a virgin, Sasuke exclaims while fetching something to eat for him and his "sweet bun". Thank you my dear gay little brother, I snort and he just yells that there is no need to thank, since it was out of love and concern. Like hell it was. Kakashi looks stunned. No shit, you have never fucked anyone before, he asks me. I do not even bother to answer. Then his face lightens up again as he tells me that my problem will soon be solved.

It seems Sakura is a beast in bed. I do not need a beast, I cannot even cope with bunnies and they are nice and fluffy, I cry out. No worries, no worries, Kakashi smiles. Well, I worry, since now I am sitting in this fancy-arse restaurant with this beautiful woman and she has already said that after this we will go to her place. To do what, oh God, to do what???!! I try to eat, but somehow the food gets stuck in my throat. Sakura seems lively though and keeps up the conversation even though I might seem a bit retarded because I am panicking so much.

Oh my God, it is the dessert already! Will you excuse me, I have to use the facilities, I apologize to her and I run to the restroom. There I take a paper bag and breathe in it trying to relax. Maybe she just wants to chat, nothing else…who am I kidding! She wants to fuck, oh shit, I feel so sick and end up throwing up in the toilet. I clean myself and get back to her. Shall we go, she asks sweetly and I gulp. Y-yes, I stutter. You do not have to be so shy, she giggles. We walk to her apartment in the breeze of the night.

**ANNOUNCEMENT:**** THIS STORY DOES NOT MEAN THAT I HAVE STOPPED WRITING SASUNARU/NARUSASU - THIS WAS A COMMISSION.**

Thoughts? Comments?


	3. Chapter 3

**ANNOUNCEMENT:**** THIS STORY DOES NOT MEAN THAT I HAVE STOPPED WRITING SASUNARU/NARUSASU - THIS WAS A COMMISSION.**

For Linda

Well, now I offer you something totally different! This is a het story, OMG! Anyways, the side pairing is still our dear SasuNaru, so do not judge this just because the main pairing is something else. **Now we will see how many of you actually appreciate my writing and not just SasuNaru/NaruSasu in my stories**. If you like my style, prove it ;D

Please do not flame (I do not find a reason for it so you better not either). I apologize for the possible misspellings and other errors.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER SASUNARU/NARUSASU STORIES TOO AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

**Pairing**: Sakura x Itachi, Sasuke x Naruto

**Summary**: Our poor virgin Itachi; it is not easy to have a gay little brother and a job at a convenience store. Then he meets a weird guy and along comes a lady in pink, who teaches him the secrets of womanhood? SakuIta, SasuNaru, M - SEX.

**Disclaimer**: I have no rights over the characters or whatsoever (do not sue me Mr. Kishimoto), I am just loaning them and returning to the rightful owner (Mr. Kishimoto).

She guides me on to the bed and asks me to wait, should I do the opposite and run? Not long after she returns wearing nothing but lace underwear. The lace is black with hints of red and silver making her glow in the dimly lit room. She walks to me and begins to undress me. Soon I am only wearing my boxers. I sit neatly with my arms folded on my lap. Relax, she giggles and I try to do that. It is not working, Stan, help me. Sakura pushes me on the bed and climbs on top of me. You look like a marten lying there in that position, Sakura smiles.

Suddenly she presses her lips against mine and slides her tongue inside my mouth. For the first time I thank Sasuke for tutoring me in kissing…although I still think it was disgusting with him; but the pros outweigh the cons in this case. I brush my tongue against her and taste her overly sweet saliva thanks to the ice cream dessert. Her lips are plush and so very soft…I cannot believe this feels so good. She nibs my lower lip and moves on to my neck.

I desperately try to unhook her bra, but I do not succeed. That is common for men, she laughs a little and does it herself. Perfect bouncy breasts with hard pinkish nipples. First I touch her neck; I lower my hand until I meet the two goddesses. Sakura presses my hands hard against her breasts and orders me to lick them. I take the nub into my mouth a roll my tongue over it, I taste her creamy skin and I decide that nuzzling between her breasts would be more than enough for me.

Sakura takes off her panties and my boxers. She lies on the bed and opens up her legs for me. Touch me, she pants. I looks at her fanny and I do not get it - it looks like an orchid or some sort of a flower; what the hell should I do? Finger me, she groans, but I cannot tell her that I do not know how. I can only see one hole and I do not think that is the right one. The panic raises its ugly head in me and I freeze. She looks at me oddly until a smile breaks on her lips. I will show you, give me your hand, she tells me.

She leads my hand over the hair dark hair until I can feel her warmth and wetness fully. Then Sakura pushes my forefinger and middle finger inside her. It is still hard to locate the actual hole; I cannot actually tell where my fingers are…maybe I should draw a map? The feeling of my fingers inside her is quite similar to that of Sasuke's mouth, when he was a baby without teeth - only softer. You are supposed to move those fingers, she says and I do what she tells me to, even though I do not know what that actually is.

Direct those fingers upwards, she huffs and I yet again I do as I am told. I can feel her walls closing in on me, almost sucking my fingers in. I basically roll my fingers inside her, feel her up until I find a softer spot that makes her spine stiffen. Oh God, rub it, she huffs. The area is softer but at the same time rougher than the rest, faster, she pleads. No, I want you to come too, come inside me, Sakura pants. My member is twitching already as I imagine how it would feel to dive into that sweetness between her legs.

She basically drags me on top of her and almost orders me to bang her into the mattress. Relax, relax, you have seen some porn movies, it cannot be that hard, right, I repeat to myself. After some time, Sakura pets my head and says that I should not worry - not everyone can get it in at first try and it is quite common. A total defeat. I should crawl somewhere and die. I think I have gotten used to the idea that I will stay a virgin for the rest of my life and after that comment I probably will.

Sakura dresses herself and I decide it is best to leave. Stan, I have lost my dignity as a man. Sakura looks like she is sorry, but she does not move from the bed to prevent me from leaving. I must have been a real disappointment. She merely smokes that cancer stick of hers, the smoke emanating and filling the tiny room. I look back from the front door and see her pressing her hands against her beautiful face. I close the door silently and run home so I would have less energy to think about the whole incident.

It is three in the morning when I finally reach my apartment. There is a lump in my throat and I feel dead tired. I decide to get something to drink and who do I find diligently sitting in the kitchen? Sasuke is almost asleep on the kitchen counter, but Naruto is as perky as ever and smiles. How did it go, he asks excited. Sasuke raises his sleepy head and blurts out that I presumably fucked it up or else I would not be here. My mood darkens even more and I do not answer.

Naruto pokes Sasuke hard and promises me that if I feel lonely and I do not find that special person I can always move in with him and Sasuke. I choke on the milk and suddenly Sasuke is very much awake. What the hell, I do not want to live with my brother forever, he almost shouts. Naruto shushes at him and they start to argue. You do not have to worry, I sigh at them and head for my room.

I can hear Naruto panicking that I will commit suicide and that it is Sasuke's fault and other shit. I smile a little. I go to bed, but before I can fall asleep the door creeks. Itachi, are you asleep already, Naruto asks. I would like to be, I murmur. Good, he says. Suddenly there is more weight on the bed and Naruto tells me sympathetically that he and Sasuke will sleep with me in the same bed so I do not get that depressed. It is as if we are a family; Sasuke is the grumpy father, I am supposedly the mother and you are our kid, he laughs.

This is the stupidest thing ever, I hear Sasuke grunt and a smile breaks on my lips. You are both idiots, I laugh slightly. This was Naruto's idea, Sasuke murmurs and I know that. He is just the type of person to save us all and make us feel better, everyone. No wonder Sasuke loves him so much. Who wants to sleep in the middle, Naruto asks me and Sasuke. Hell no, I will not sleep next to my brother, that is gross, Sasuke voices out and it is fine by me as long as I can sleep. So, it is Naruto between us then and his snoring lulls us to much needed sleep.

When I wake up, I feel sore all over because it was too cramped in the bed. The smell of coffee lingers in the air and I rub my eyes. God, I feel like shit. I enter the kitchen just to find Kakashi sipping coffee with Sasuke and Naruto. Naruto is chatting lively with Kakashi as Sasuke is practically asleep on the counter a mug in his hand. Oh, good morning Itachi, Kakashi grins. How did it go, you know with Sakura, he asks. Why the hell are you here at this hour in the morning, I grunt and leave his question hanging in the air.

You are one hell of a bunch of idiots, he blew it, oh my God, you do not get it - Itachi did not taste pussy or whatever he is into, Sasuke snarls really loudly. Thank you little wanker brother, I grunt. Naruto looks angry. Hey hey kids, do not fight, Kakashi tries to calm everyone. I pour myself a large cup of coffee and drown in the sweet smell of it. So, it did not work out - but there is plenty of fish in the sea! I know; I have tried most of them, Kakashi chuckles. I choke on my coffee.

While Naruto helps me to breathe again, Sasuke escorts the escort out, great. I never did tell him that I handpicked my neon tetras and they did not bite my hand…I do not fancy fish with teeth. I think it is utterly sweet and kind from Naruto to worry so much about me and well, it is great that Sasuke looks displeased with it. I feel already better and decide to devote my time to my little pets.

Four days after the whole disaster with Sakura my phone rings. Without looking the display I answer the phone. Hi, it is me Sakura…sorry it took some time to call you, haha, she laughs, but it sounds a little awkward. I am sorry, you know, Kakashi told me that you are one hell of a beast in bed so you surprised me by…hmm, being, err untouched? She says quietly. That son of a bitch, I murmur.

The thing is, it does not matter that much…what matters is that I thought you were sweet, shy and interesting and, well, I think we totally started with the wrong foot, she says. Let us switch that left one to the right one and start from the beginning, movies and such, are you interested? Her voice is almost pleading. I am silent for a while and I can hear her heavy breath. Hell yes, I blurt. She laughs merrily.

I think that I like fish with teeth too, I think aloud. What, Sakura asks a little astonished. We can eat sushi if you want? I do not know whether those fish had teeth or anything, but…she says wonderingly. I laugh heartily, that we should, I say to her. While talking absolute nonsense with her I can see Naruto gawking near me and Sasuke looking pleased like a father. It seems that everyone I know is a little "fishy" - but I would not take it any other way.

Oh my God, Itachi is going to get pussy, Naruto screams and our neighbour yells back that we are retards and we should know that they do not like to hear the word "pussy" this time of the morning. I gather enough courage and yell loudly back "octoPUSSY". Itachi, you are lame, Sasuke sighs. Then our neighbour decides to entertain us more and throws a sausage through our open window. It is a cock, a dick, a penis! Naruto screams even louder and Sasuke orders me to find something to throw back.

This is insane, I mumble and Sasuke is already drawing a war plan on the table with ketchup. Stan, I think I will be late for work today. Load the cannons, Sasuke orders and I throw a cabbage with a sidespin. This must be the best day of my life - another second time around with everything and I love it. Now, where did I put that carton of eggs…?

**ANNOUNCEMENT:**** THIS STORY DOES NOT MEAN THAT I HAVE STOPPED WRITING SASUNARU/NARUSASU - THIS WAS A COMMISSION.**

_**P.S. TODAY (MAY 19) IS YOUR MYSTICAL MACHINE GUN'S BIRTHDAY - I AM 23 NOW**__**! THE REASON WHY I CHOSE TO POST THIS LAST CHAPTER TODAY :D THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT DEAR READERS! MORE STORIES TO COME!**_

Thoughts? Comments?


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